Saturday, November 30, 2013

iPhone photo dump (a.k.a. November can't end with 13 posts because I am neurotic)...

The following pictures were some of my favorites from the month, but never made it into a post.  At least, I don't think they did.  My memory isn't what it used to be, folks.

Playing the piano with Uncle Adam.

Timeout.  A necessary discipline tool at this age.
He fake cries well.

Ginger on his nose!

 Playing with Coop and discovering that everyone has a belly button.

There will never be enough sleeping baby pictures.

Post nap snuggle on daddy at Gran's house.

Snack time at Dick's.  Because, obviously.
  
Swim class bliss!


BLUE STEEL!


 And now on to DECEMBER...

Thursday, November 28, 2013

I'm too happy, tired and FULL to care if any of the following makes sense...

I don't even know what to say about Thanksgiving.  Mainly because it has been an awesome day THAT JUST KEEPS GOING AND GOING AND GOING AND GOING.

Seriously.

We woke up at 6:30 because we registered to run the 8 mile Turkey Trot like a$$hats.  It was 28 degrees.  I was cold.  As is evident below:

Please stop taking my picture, Trevor.  I can't feel my face.  

Because "I can't feel my face" means "selfie".  Obviously.
Also, why hasn't anyone ever told me that I have a Jay Leno-esk chin?!

I've decided Trevor is suuuuuuper annoying to run races with because he insisted on arriving at the starting line FORTY FIVE minutes early.  And that was with all my efforts to delay standing in the cold for no good reason for as long as possible.  Mentally, I compare it to that time he was in charge of our travel itinerary and got us to BWI SIX HOURS BEFORE OUR FLIGHT TO DFW in 2008.

Yeah, still not over it.

Luckily, the freezing temps got our booties across the finish line in a respectable (if you are us) hour and twenty minutes.  Because the trot was only the beginning of our day, and we still had showers to take, country club clothes to don and a certain little, hyperactive dude to pick up from Gran's house.


This is what my kid looks like watching Toy Story after being
fed a slice of pecan pie for breakfast by his grandmother.
OMG.

As Gran would say, "wilder than a hoot owl".
I don't even know what that means, but Ban was it.

Not that she did it on her own.  Uncle Spencer helped.
(Not that MY kid needs much convincing to eat pie!)

When we arrived, Banner was just starting to come down from his pie-induced sugar high and poor Gran looked like she needed a nap. 

(I have a bad feeling that the only lesson Gran learned this morning is to only give Banner sugar immediately before returning him to us.  Lord help us.)


Post-race blurry iPhone family photo attempt #1

Post-race blurry iPhone family photo attempt #2

Thanksgiving PART 1 was at Brook Hollow.  We attempted to take another family picture.  It didn't go well.  But Banner was wearing a collared shirt and sweater and I had actually made a rare attempt at blowdrying my hair, so we had to try.  Mimi is a patient soul:


And, yes, I realize that you can't even tell that I made an effort hair-wise.  But I assure you:  said effort was made.

Then it was on to food.  Banner is thankful for sweet pickles.  

This is Banner's first of THREE plates.  Every pickle was consumed.
Banner is to pickles as I am to olives.  No kidding.

The time between plates two and three was spent running around the golf course like a crazed maniac.  A friend of Trevor's from high school tried to convince me that Banner doesn't weigh enough to injure the putting green.  But I'm not so sure.


At least, we calmed down (briefly) to have a deep conversation with Uncle Baaaaa:


Then, it was home to nap (for a mere 45 minutes) before Thanksgiving PART II with Gran and Pop-Pop.  


Banner was running on fumes, with *almost* explains the following videos.

Dancing to Selena Gomez at half time.

The annoying chicken.

And to clarify, no one was able to capture a video that adequately depicts Banner's INSANE energy level tonight.  BECAUSE WE WERE TRING TO KEEP PROTECT HIM FROM HIMSELF, not photo/video document.  But, believe me, Banner was a complete and utter spaz.  

Needless to say, we were home by 7:30.  Banner was bathed and asleep by 7:45 and I am in my PJs at 8 PM.  But AT LEAST I AM AWAKE.  Trevor is snoring as I type, but still clutching the TV remote like his life depends on it.  Like I'd even attempt to change the channel to anything but football.

(Not because I've been trained well, but because I'm too exhausted to care.)

Happy Thanksgiving, y'all!

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!


Monday, November 18, 2013

That weird moment when...

...you realize your toddler thinks the ADA sidewalk ramp is a slide that he wants to go down over and over again:
 

Note to self:  take Banner to the park more often.

Saturday, November 16, 2013

Because it is a FRAMER that actually ended up in a frame. That is a really big deal. Just ask Hilary.

James French, who photographed my sister's wedding, takes pictures every Halloween, Christmas and Easter in a park over near my father's house.  It is first come, first serve and costs $15.  You pay upfront, and just cross your fingers and hope the kiddo is feeling cooperative and smily.  Because, really: you never know with these pint-sized humans.  The portrait is later mailed to your home address.

I've been waiting patiently for a month for mine to arrive.

I had an idea it was going to awesome because Mr. French was armed with a stuffed Grover doll.  Banner thinks Grover is a blue Elmo, and we all know that Elmo is essentially the toddler version of a happy pill.  The Ban-Man was instantly all smiles:

Taken with my iPhone back on that day in mid October.

And here is the photo that arrived earlier this week:


Love, love, love!

The thing is, I am TERRIBLE at changing out the frames in our house.  I have many of the same pictures on display that I originally put together some 10-15 years ago to decorate various college and graduate school dorm rooms and apartments.  The most current image of my sister - until she got married last year and GAVE US a framed picture of her and Adam for Christmas - was taken when she was 13 on a horse that passed away in 2009.  My mother-in-law got so tired of giving us framers that never ended up in frames that she brought over several randomly while we were out of town, and strategically placed them around the living room.  They are still there, which probably means that she has cracked the code of how to get current pictures on display in our house.

(I just hope she'll come back and swap the images out with new ones as the years go by.  Makes my self induced photo time capsule much more interesting with a  pop of "current" every now and again.)

I read blogs of people who put together photo collages on accent walls, hallways and nurseries, and I ALWAYS think to myself, "What a wonderful idea".  But then I remember that I never got around to framing ANY pictures of our wedding day or newborn pictures of Banner.  So maybe more realistic goal for me is to simply commit to swapping out a photo now and again with a new favorite?

You know, like baby steps?

So, I committed to framing the pumpkin picture above, and found a 5x5 that needed an updated image.  Except the picture already in there had been there for so long that it was GLUED TO THE GLASS.  It took six hours of soaking the glass in warm, soapy water to get all the old photograph residue off.  But I persevered and 24 hours later FINALLY had the pumpkin picture framed and on display in a place of honor.  It looks awesome, if I don't say so myself.  Trevor even noticed it, which is really saying something.

(And, don't worry, I scanned the old image in before ripping it out of the frame for good.)

Unfortunately, the mere fact that "swapping out a photo" took an entire day probably means that the next time I do that again will be around the time Banner graduates from high school. 


Friday, November 15, 2013

Banner Art (G - N)...

Again, it is unlikely that anyone (other than Trevor and possibly, one day, Banner) cares about seeing these, but it makes me happy to have a record of my kiddo's "art" projects.  And, well, scanning these in takes up a lot less space than trying to hold on to them in a scrapbook. 
 
Plus, as I mentioned before, it reminds me about what he was learning when and gives me ideas for projects to repeat in a few years when he is learning to read and write.
 
G WEEK:
 
G is for...
 
...glass paintings. 
 
...yeah, no idea.
 
H WEEK:
 
H is for...
 
...horse

 
...house
(or, as Banner says, "a$$")
 
 
I WEEK:
 
I is for...
 
 
...ice

J WEEK:

J is for...

 
...jack-o-lanterns
 
 
K WEEK:
 
K is for...
 

...kite
 
...kings, kittens, kangaroos, kites, keys and knitting
 
L WEEK:

L is for...

...lion

...leaves
 
M WEEK:

M is for...

...Macaroni
(most of which is STILL in my car because it doesn't travel well)
 
N WEEK:

N is for NOTE...

Front of card
 
Inside of card

Thursday, November 14, 2013

Backwards and barefooted...

Y'all.  I am so behind.  Again.  It is like the theme of my life.  I'm always thinking I'm going to try to write these short, witty posts about...whatever.  And then I realize that nothing about my life is remotely witty (if only!) and I am apparently incapable of keeping even the shortest story...well, short.

Moving along...


We have stopped duct taping Banner into his diaper for three reasons:

1.  It wasn't working.  He is a determined little booger with biceps of steel.  I watched him rip his diaper off one morning on the baby monitor like a little, blonde Incredible Hulk.  It was simultaneously terrifying and impressive. 

2.  The heat from his body coupled with the, uh, "moisture" from the diaper had a temporary tattoo effect on Banner's skin.  Twenty two months is too young to have Captain America inked on your hip.

3.  My husband is brilliant and realized that Banner couldn't access his diaper to begin with if we simply...wait for it, wait for it...put his sleep sack on backwards.  Seriously, why did we not think of that in the first place?

The only problem is that Banner has already started trying to get of it.  No success yet, but it only took him two days to figure out how to unzip the backwards sleep sack halfway.  I may have given birth to the next Harry Houdini.


In other news, Banner has become suuuuuuper opinionated about the most bizarre things.  Like socks.  And what he will and will not eat for breakfast.  I honestly don't mind.  I just wish I knew which pair of socks he will wear, or why he suddenly hates all things waffle, squeezie and anything defined as "cracker" (a.k.a. his usual favorites). 

Mostly everything about the irrational toddler phase cracks me up, because, really?  What can you do?  But then there are the mornings when you turn around for thirty seconds to grab a yogurt from the fridge and fill up an empty sippy cup, and completely miss the fact that your son has just taken off the "problem" socks in protest (along with his sneakers) and neatly placed them on the lower level of the baker's rack in the kitchen.

Which is how MY kid ended up at school on Tuesday completely barefooted.

(Worst mother ev-ver.)

Luckily, I had an extra pair of socks in the car, and the class had no outdoor plans.  Because the museum's largest fundraiser of the year was on Tuesday, and The Great Sock Crisis of November 12th, 2013 already had me running behind.  There was simply no time to run home for a pair of shoes.  Even if we were scheduled to get our first hard freeze.

(Because why wouldn't all this coincide with the arrival of an Artic blast?)

As I left Banner's class, I kissed my favorite little mess on the forehead and told him to try to be a little less irrational.  You know, for his teachers' sake.  A dad overheard me in the hallway and laughed.

Dad:  "He is...what?  Two?"

Me:  "Almost."

Dad:  "Well, if you think the twos are bad, just wait until you get to the effing threes."

Awesome.  Even more irrational greatness to look forward to.  I may use some of the extra Avengers-themed duct tape to hide an emergency pair of shoes and socks on the underside of Banner's car seat.

Tuesday, November 12, 2013

Pumpkin Village...

Or as Banner calls them "Monk-ins".

Nothing says fall to me like pumpkins, and we've done a lot to try and get our fill of those big, orange balls this season.  

The following are some of my favorite photos taken at the Arboretum over the course of our many (many) visits there (so far) this autumn: