Saturday, May 23, 2015

For example...

An example of what happens at meal time: The kid writes "tickets" all the time, and loves asking people questions and scribbling things down like he is taking notes. If he grows up to be a cop or reporter, I won't be surprised.

An example of something he learned exclusively from his father: "Daddy, I stepped on a frog with my butt."

An example of what other mom's think of my kid: "Hey, Trev? Just got a text message from Charlie's mom asking if Banner has shoes other than crocs and rain boots. I'm going to go with 'our kid is a trendsetter' instead of the 'thanks to YOUR kid, my kid will only wear crocs and rain boots' shame that is most likely being implied here."

An example of the types of questions my kid asks me that have no answer: "Yes, mommy, but what does this graham cracker MEAN?! I just want to know!"

An example of how I frequently find myself having two way conversations with my son's internal organs: "Mama! My tummy says hi to you! You have to say 'hi' back or it rude."

An example of what we talk about in the car:

Me: "Who is the best superhero?"
Banner: "Charlie!"
Me: "Your friend Charlie is better than the Hulk, Thor and Spider-Man?"
Banner: "Yeah."
Me: "Why?"
Banner: "Because Charlie listens to me when no one else will."
Me: "Okay, fair enough. But what about Captain America?"
Banner: "[Exasperated...] Mama, Captain America only has a white belt. My white belt has an orange stripe."

An example of what happens if I sing in the car: "Mama, I sorry but you not a very good singer."
(Banner, on the other hand, sings in the car AND shower.)

An example of my kid's humility:
Me: "Thanks for being such a good helper this morning and listening to mommy!"
Banner: "It's because I awesome!"

An example of my kid's irrational fears: Banner suddenly refuses to wear his crocs to school because ants might crawl in the holes while he is playing on the Big Boy Playground, and bite his toes. He will, however, wear them anywhere else.

An example of where I stand:
Me: "I love you so much, buddy."
Banner: "Thanks."

An example of what Banner thinks of my wardrobe choices:
Banner: "I thought you said you were wearing a dress today."
Me: "No, I said I was going to get dressed."
Banner: "Oh. [Disappointed...] You must really like jeans."
Me: "I do! They are super comfy."
Banner: "[Audible sigh] Too bad jeans aren't as pretty as dresses, huh, mommy."

An example of how Banner is more like his father than me: He asked for bacon for dessert.

An example of why I shouldn't disclose too much information in the morning when he is feeling particularly "helpful": Banner applied shampoo and lotion to the back of his head after I mentioned to him in passing that I wanted to put some leave in conditioner in his hair and give it a good brush before we left for school. I did my best to get it out with a wet washcloth and then put a hat on his head.

No idea why he looks like a mini Eminem here.

An example of why mama (occasionally) still has it:  Banner told me that Thor was a girl just like me.  Not really sure what he was implying but choosing to believe he was saying that his mom is totally kick a$$ just like the Norse God of lightening and thunder.  Because, obviously.

An example of why a consistent early bedtime is a good thing for my kid: Otherwise the chances of him waking up EVEN EARLIER than usual is increased by 150%. Which, of course, leads directly into a meltdown of epic irrationality before 7 AM, refusal to complete even the simplest of tasks because you looked in his general direction ("Don't smile at me, mama! I WANT TO DO IT MYSELF!"), coupled with the likelihood that I'm about to spend the next two hours running around the house chasing a naked and NOT eating three year old who is simultaneously screaming about both being cold and "I JUST SOOOOOO HUNGEE!"

An example of why I'm the worst mom on the planet: I won't let him eat cookies for dinner or chocolate for breakfast.

An example of the things that randomly pop out of his mouth: "I don't get angry. I get happy!"

"Look, mom!  I made a letter with my trains!"

An example of why sometimes I just give up: I tried to get Banner to wear his rain boots one morning because it was actually raining, but was told that he can't wear rain boots in the rain. #ofcourse

An example of how Haskell's role in the family has changed:
Me: "Hi, buddy [petting Haskell's head]."
Banner: "Mama, Haskell no your buddy! Haskell MY buddy!"
Me: "Oh?"
Banner: "Your buddy is Gypsy and daddy's buddy is Alley. My buddy is Haskell."
Me: "Does Haskell know about this?"
Banner: "Yeah. We talked about it."

Another example of where I stand:  After spending the ENTIRE day with him, Banner will tell me, "Daddy is my best friend."  I console myself with the fact that the little guy will almost always choose riding in my car with me over Trevor.

Sunday, May 17, 2015

Gone fishin'...

The father/son cuteness continues:
Taken at the ranch in April.

But why drive all the way to central Texas, when you can "fish" at the local watering hole with daddy and Uncle Spencer?

Saturday, May 16, 2015

Fitted for his first penguin suit...

This little hunk is going to be in Yum and CEO's wedding in July, and just got measured for his first tux.  I realize I'm biased but the following pics are pretty much the cutest thing I've ever seen:

Now if we could only tame that blonde mop on top of his head!

Sunday, May 10, 2015

Mother's Day...

Just documenting some of my fabulous Mother's Day swag from this year!

My card played music and was quickly reclaimed by Banner.
But my favorite was the personalization on the front.  I love all the robots!

My Mother's Day presents included a latte and three superhero
t-shirts loving picked out by Banner (and paid for by Trevor). #boymom

Sunday, May 03, 2015

Boys Weekend...

It has been quite the weekend for Banner and Trevor.

First, there was Banner's first overnight camping trip in the backyard.  Which, as far as I'm concerned, was also Trevor's first overnight camping trip.  Because in our nearly thirteen years together, I've never known Trevor to camp.  Until this happened:

The evening was full of other fun camping activities; including hot dogs, citronella candle "fireside" games and stories, and - of course - s'mores.

This was milliseconds before Banner tried to grab the grill with his hands.
I'm not sure I'll ever recover from the memory of it almost happening.

Thoughts on s'mores...

The most amazing thing was that the both boys made it outside ALL night.  I thought for sure they'd be back in by midnight!  But I was totally wrong.  Not a peep from the backyard until about 6:30 AM.  Trevor said Banner fell asleep holding his hand, and whispered, "Night, night, daddy.  I love you," just before closing his eyes.  #omgmyheart

The next day, was Banner's very first "bayball" (baseball) game.  Spencer and Trevor took Banner early, Amy made him a couple of "my first game" posters,  and the kid got two game balls and his hat signed in less than five innings.  A successful first trip by anyone's standards.

There are many more "boy weekend' activities being planned for this summer.  Stay tuned!

Saturday, May 02, 2015

A quiet Banner is almost always a Banner up to no good...

Banner:  "Mama, mama, mama!  I no fall asleep in the car!"

Me:  "Yeah.  I can see that.  Hey, Trev?"

Trevor:  "Yeah?"

Me:  "So, apparently, we forgot to take the pen away from Banner after lunch."

Trevor:  "Why? [Looks in car]  Oh."

Friday, May 01, 2015

I'll ask him for his thoughts on the Kentucky Derby in the morning...

I should preface this post with the fact that neither Trevor nor I follow boxing, and it always blows my mind when I hear of another fight that I can order on Pay Per View.  It just isn't my thing, and yet it makes MILLIONS.

But it is almost impossible to escape all the hype surrounding the upcoming Floyd Mayweather-Manny Pacquiao contest this weekend.  So, when the DJs on the radio started talking about the fight, I jokingly asked Banner how he felt about it:

Me:  "So Ban?  Who do you think is going to win?  Mayweather or Pacquiao?"

Banner:  "[With authority and without hesitation] Pacquiao."

Me:  "Oh really.  Why is that?"

Banner:  "Because Mayweather too old."

Me:  "Buddy?  How do you know Mayweather is too old?"

Banner:  "Miss Stephanie said."

Me:  "Banner, I somehow doubt your preschool teacher is talking to you about Mayweather versus Pacquiao."

Banner:  "[Exasperated sigh] He too old, mama.  Trust me.  He too old."