On teachers (or at least teachers that work over the summer)...

Teachers are insane. Or maybe I’m insane for dealing with them. Or at least the ones crazy enough to still be working in July. Whatever happened to summer vacation?

STORY I: A certain school had a program in April that was partially funded by a group called AP. AP paid for just over half of the $250 fee. The school was responsible for the rest. I was promised repeatedly that the money was coming, but the school’s half never arrived. So, I started sending firm letters to the school’s principle. This resulted in a check being cut for the amount in question. Unfortunately for us, the check was made out to AP and mailed to AP’s parent group, BT - even though the invoice was from my museum and clearly stated that all checks should be made out to us and sent to OUR mailing address.

Oh, and since the AP and BT offices are run by a bunch of monkeys, the money has gone astray.

STORY II: A teacher wants us to coordinate bus tours for two groups of middle schoolers in July and August. But she wants nothing to do with the planning and refuses to even choose a topic for the tour (note: we offer over 20 different tours, so I could use some help narrowing down an appropriate tour focus). Her last email literally said (and yes I am quoting here), “Sorry it took me a while to get back to you. I've been out of the office. Anyway, would it be alright if we looked to y'all to come up with a tour that would be best fit for the kids? You're the expert! So if we could just show up and enjoy that would be terrific!”

Really?!

STORY III: A summer camp wanted the museum to come out and teach the kids over a two week period, but they gave us very little heads up (they called us on Thursday for a camp scheduled to start on Tuesday). Thinking of it as an interesting challenge, a teacher friend of mine and I developed the curriculum, bought supplies and implemented the program for a small group of local middle school students.

Originally, the program’s cumulating event was scheduled for July 2nd, but then last week it was changed to July 1st. And on June 30th, it changed back to July 2nd. So, the summer camp’s obviously a well-organized machine. Right...I’m glad you are going along with me on that.

Anyway, we conducted videotaped interviews on Tuesday (yes, that would be June 30th, 2009), and I received an email late the same afternoon asking if the interviews would be edited and ready for public viewing on Thursday morning. I think the actual language was, “Will the interviews taped today be turned into a documentary for Thursday’s cumulating event for the parents?”

Um, no.

I wrote back saying that we had the technology to capture the interviews, but not to string them together and turn them into documentary films. Especially, on such short notice.

This prompted a phone call where the teacher asked if there was anything I would be able to show during Thursday’s event. For the children.

When did I become such a sucker?

Me: “I can probably have the rough footage available for the participating students and their parents to view Thursday morning. We just don’t have the technology to turn it into a documentary or proper video presentation in less than 48 hours.”

Teacher: “That’s fine. Can we project it on the big screen in front of the entire school?”

Me: “Um, I guess.”

Teacher: “Great! Do you have a projector?”

Me: “Actually, no. The museum just bought a Mac for this project, and we don’t have a projector that is compatible with it or an adapter. Do you have a Mac-ready projector we can use? Or a cord adapter?”

Teacher: “I think so.”

Me: “Okay, think we are good to go then.”

Teacher: “Great!”

Then, today, the teacher emailed me again asking if I could bring a projector. And a screen.

Whaaaaat? Wait a minute!

I wrote her back, and reminded her of my problem with the Mac and the compatibility problems with our projector. As for the screen, the museum has one, but its location (thanks to the renovations) is a bit of a mystery at the moment. I promised her I would look for it, though (which I did this afternoon with no luck).

I received an email back from the teacher stating that she forgot about the compatibility issue and would check around to see what she could come up with. She eluded to a couple of her coworkers that were Mac users and might have a projector or adapter I could borrow.

I brought the laptop home and have been working tonight to figure out the finer details of operating a Mac and iMovie (I’ve never used a Mac before, so there is a bit of a learning curve). While the Tuesday's interview footage was downloading, I logged into my work email and discovered yet another email from the lead teacher. It was time stamped at 7:30 PM:

“I think we have found a projector, but we need to know if you have a Mac cord.”

...?!?!

I wrote her back and explained (yet again) the problem with the Mac and the projector.

Of course, since my email was sent at 9:15 PM, it is doubtful that she’ll see it before tomorrow morning.

Did I mention that the museum is providing this entire program completely free of charge? No? Yeah. We are getting paid absolutely nothing to deal with this nonsense.

Awesome.

The good news is that the footage is downloaded and ready to be seen - if only from a computer screen. Hopefully, that will be enough for the students and their adoring parents. If I didn’t have to be at the school before 9 AM tomorrow morning, I would totally go and buy a stupid adapter for the museum’s projector.

Grumble, grumble…

The long, holiday weekend cannot come soon enough.

Neither here nor there...

Typical interoffice correspondence:

From: Nora
Sent: Wednesday, July 01, 2009 3:44 PM
To: Deals
Subject: Hurts

My butt hurts.

Happy Canada Day!

“I am not a Starfleet commander, or T.J. Hooker. I don't live on Starship NCC-170, or own a phaser. And I don't know anybody named Bones, Sulu, or Spock. And no, I've never had green alien sex, though I'm sure it would be quite an evening. I speak English and French, not Klingon! I drink Labatt's, not Romulan ale! And when someone says to me 'Live long and prosper', I seriously mean it when I say, 'Get a life'. My doctor's name is not McCoy, it's Ginsberg. And tribbles were puppets, not real animals. PUPPETS! And when I speak, I never, ever talk like every. Word. Is. Its. Own. Sentence. I live in California, but I was raised in Montreal. And yes, I've gone where no man has gone before, but I was in Mexico and her father gave me permission! My name is William Shatner, and I am Canadian!”

- William Shatner

On irrigation systems, face plants and moles…

Hi. I'm a mole. What's up?

They started putting in our new sprinkler system yesterday, which means my yard is currently a series of trenches and dirt mounds. A fact that has not been lost on my neighbors. Last night alone, on three completely separate occasions, people walking past my house commented that it looked like I had one hell of a mole problem.

Oh, ha, ha.

The dogs are having a hard time adjusting – especially (surprise, surprise) Haskell. He has a difficult remembering that a trench exists on the far side of any dirt mound. The result? Several doggie face plants that easily could have ended with broken or sprained front legs, but (thank goodness) have only concluded with a snout full of mud, several hearty sneezes, and a (very) bruised ego.

Stupid dog.

Haskell has now started to over-jump all dirt mounds to avoid such embarrassing face plants in front of his sisters. It is like watching a four-legged long jump at a track and field meet at every “potty break”. I can only hope, for Haskell’s sake, that the work finishes soon.

This is not a picture of my backyard, just Haskell jumping.
Don't worry - we generally mow our grass before it gets THIS long!

On telemarketers...

My stepfather played this for me yesterday afternoon, and I thought I’d share it with you. If only I was creative enough to have this much fun with telemarketers! Sigh…I’m generally the type that tries – repeatedly – to get off the phone without being rude. I hung up on one once, and I still feel guilty about it. Not sure what that says about my personality, but it is probably the driving reason behind my constant screening of the landline at home. Better to let the machine pick up than to risk insulting a telemarketer who I’ll never meet, and only exists to annoy me.

Yep. I’m pretty hopeless.

Anyway, enjoy:

As of today…

…I am officially living in sin.

(Sigh)

On impulse buys and relaxing water features…

Our new fountain has been delivered…just in time for it to be officially too hot to sit outside and enjoy it.

Sigh…

Why do I live in Texas again? And why are we already breaking the century mark in June? This does not bode well for August.

The next installment of "The City That Works"...

My latest attempt to help raise awareness about the City of Dallas’ proposed budget comes from in the form of an email plea from a fellow art/cultural provider:

From: M. W. Conley
Sent: Wednesday, June 24, 2009 2:29 PM
Subject: Last City Budget Forum

The last of four budget forums will be held tomorrow at 6:30 Thursday at Winfrey point -- I strongly encourage you and everyone you can muster to attend. The City Manager's office is proposing doing away with the Office of Cultural Affairs and slotting the function under Libraries -- that on top of roughly a 40% cut in budget (they will say about 30% - but just learned today that that number already factors the $2M taken from WRR's fund - so in truth it's more like 40%), more than any other department as far as we can find out -- This in the year that our Arts District is finally coming on line. This is a remarkable slap in the face to the art's community in Dallas.

We knew cuts were coming and were prepared for it - we've been working with our groups since last year to prepare - but this is an outrage. 60% of the city budget is sacrosanct, "Public Safety", and will not be cut -- but other than police and fire, what does it contain? I defy you to parse the details in the briefing http://www.dallascityhall.com/council_briefings/index.html.

Without raising taxes, the plan is to lay off about 1,000 city employees, gut health and human services, cultural offerings and cultural and community centers, libraries and educational enhancements, after-school and summer programs that target our youth. I tell you, that's a recipe for needing those extra 200 police if I ever heard one.

If they charged every person in Dallas $154.10 - that would make up the $190M deficit. Of course, I know we can't do it like that - but simply as a reference point.

Art's and Cultural Organizations have a huge economic impact on this city. What happens now? Please help and let your voice be heard.

Thank you
Maura

You can read my previous attempts to raise awareness about this subject HERE and HERE.