Tuesday, February 14, 2006

Yet another reason why the City of Dallas is "special"...

Over the course of the past six months, as you may recall, I have complained about the various things that drive me crazy about the City of Dallas.

And, no, nothing has changed.

The City of Dallas is STILL completely inefficient and disorganized.

They drive me crazy, mainly because they do nothing (and do it in a matter that is NOT described as being "timely").

Anyway, as you may or may not remember, the museum where RR and I work has flooded twice in four months. This, as you might have guessed, is ALWAYS a good thing.

The second flood occurred on December 7th, which completely explains why the City just showed up yesterday (yes, that would be February 13th) to clean the carpets. Because, you know, making them wet again is really the answer at this point. Heaven forbid they actually, I dunno’, replace the carpeting this time around. I don't know about every one else, but I'm guessing that normal-not-flooded-on-twice-carpet does not go "crunch, crunch" when you walk on it.

Stupid city...

AND – to make matters worse - they sent out workers to clean the carpets that had NO IDEA how to operate the carpet-cleaning machinery. Because that’s the definition of competence! Not to mention the reassuring feeling you get when the so-called professionals are in the hallway trying to figure out where the “ON” switch is located.

However, my FAVORITE thing is that the City is completely unfazed by the fact that we have MOLD growing in the walls of the building. Because you ALWAYS want mold growing in the walls of a historic site (not to mention a facility containing an archive). That's a super-swell combo, let me tell you.

You know what makes it even better?...the fact that it is growing in RR's office, which - since RR is our resident Archivist - shares a common wall with the archives. I mean, can it get any worse?!

Oh, wait...it can! Since the building is sinking, there is a two-inch gap between RR's office wall and the floor. This means that all mold spores are free to transport themselves on the Airborne Express from RR's office - through the fun gap between the floor and the wall - right into the archives. Brilliant, I tell you! Brilliant!

But, wait. There is more. The City of Dallas has not one, but TWO new mottos. Ah, yes. New mottos (because THAT is what the City needs right now - not a swift kick to the A** but new city slogans). Any guess as to what they are? No?..

Okay, I'll tell you:

    1. "Dallas - together, we do it better!"

    2. "The City that Works: Diverse, Vibrant & Progressive"

Because, you know...obviously!

My question: Is the City kidding, or are they just trying to give themselves something to, say, strive for?

17 comments:

Amstaff Mom said...

what a joke. Almost makes me ashamed to say I'm from Dallas.

And the gap in the ceiling cracked me up when I saw it.

Welcome to Dallas, where we have the Sixth Floor and the Sinking Floor.

Katie said...

Airborne Express - CLASSIC

Oh Deals I can offer nothing but sympathy and lots and lots of laughter, not at your expense, or even RR's but at the situation and the ignorance of the great city of Big D

Ben said...

Well, when you showed the guy how to turn the "carpet-cleaning machinery" on... you were technically working "together" and it did work much better in the "on" position.

Looks to me like you have achieved this lofty goal.

Still, I am glad there are no mold spores in my office.

JLR said...

I feel so sorry for the two of you on a daily basis. Sad, sad, sad. If I could do anything to make you feel better, I would, but like my mother, my only solution to every problem is food. So all I can do is say is that I feel bad for you! Unless . . .





Would Girl Scout cookies help?

RR said...

The city employees who finally came to check out my office say that it isn't mold, it's mildew...which makes me feel so much better (are your sarcasm alert sensors on today, city officials?).

JLR said...

rr-it looked like mold to me, and it did fluoresce. I'm not saying I know more than those guys, I'm just saying that these guys haven't shown that they really know what they're talking about. And in any case, YOU NEED NEW CARPET.

RR said...

What are you talking about, JLR? Crunchy carpet is good. It means no one can sneak up on me. And the "carpet cleaners" left behind a clump of whatever it was they dumped on my carpet to "clean" it, so now I have a weapon to throw at unwelcome co-workers.

(In case any city employees are reading this, let me explain to you--since you have no since of humor--that I am only kidding. Please send new carpet. Please.)

Deals On Wheels said...

Is it a good thing or a bad thing that my feet are tingling again today? What was that stuff they put on the carpet, anyway?!

JLR said...

See, this is why, when I study up there, I study in the library. Also for the record I do not like the way your break room smells, but that is not related to the carpet problems.

Deals On Wheels said...

I thought that you had no sense of smell (or is that just your sister)?

J.B. said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Deals On Wheels said...

Turd? Is that you?!

RR said...

As the person who has the mildewy office, I would like to say on Deals' behalf that this is something worthy of complaint.

J.B. said...

Of course this is "the turd". Who else is man enough to complain about your complaining?

Deals On Wheels said...

RR meet "The Turd".

"The Turd" meet RR.

As they said in the LION KING, "It starts..."

And as "The Runt" says, "I feel uncomfortable..."

*sigh*

Welcome, baby brother, to the world 'o' BLOGDOM.

(Does mom know, yet?)

Hehe...

Lia said...

Together, you do what better?

And clearly, a progressive city has something it needs to be progressing to.

Deals On Wheels said...

Lia: My thoughts exactly!!