Friday, February 13, 2015

Another episode of Bannerisms...

Banner with a stuffy nose: "Mama!  There's a bug in my nose!"

I put a little VapoRub under his nostrils with the hope that the strong menthol odor would help open him up a bit.  I guess it did, because the next day I caught him trying to smear it all over his face and chin to "get the bug out again".

He thinks pickup trucks are called "hiccups".

New mantra when he wakes up in the morning:  "Mama, I a very hungry boy!"

Thinks the word "computer" is the funniest thing ever.  Because it involves the word "poot".  Com-poot-er!  OMG.

Equates the word "disgusting" with "poopy diapers".  And yet, will call me into his bathroom LIKE HE'S TRAPPED AND THE ROOM IS ON FIRE to marvel at the "really, really BIG poop" he just unloaded into the potty.

Has learned that the Hulk's real name is Bruce Banner, and now tries to attach the word "Banner" to all his favorites.  For instance, Spiderman is now "Peter Parker Banner".

In related news, I don't know how we are going to tell him that he was named for a family member, not The Incredible Hulk.  Maybe this TRUE STORY will help?

During dress up, if you ask Banner what his real name is, he will respond with the alter ego of whatever character he is currently dressed up as.  We are still a little iffy on our colors (the kid just doesn't care if the grass is green or not), but we KNOW that Captain America is really Steve Rogers and that Ironman is Tony Stark.  Again, priorities...we got 'em!

The kid got his neck stuck in a key chain.  Yet more proof that he really is MINE.

Related:  He gets "stuck" a lot in general.  I can totally relate.  Just ask anyone who knew me in high school or college (or, you know, in general). 

Banner can be throwing a fit on the floor, and will insist that he is "a happy boy".  It takes all my will power not to laugh.

His number one excuse why he can't listen?  He doesn't want to.  At least he is honest?  Anyone?

On the flip side, Banner desperately wants to be a "big helper".  The kid is happiest when he is doing you a favor or helping out in anyway.  The only caveat is that he only wants to help with certain things (i.e. bringing mommy her purse, putting shoes away, feeding the dogs, etc.).  Sadly, helping to clean up his toys is never something Banner wants to do.  Obviously, it isn't always a choice (and sometimes he happily complies), but just as often it is a major struggle.

Randomly walks around the house or mall doing his karate drills:  "Out!  In!  Tuck!  KIAI!"

Banner is OBSESSED with the song "Hooked On A Feeling" except he calls it the "hoo hoo cha cha" song.

It is equal parts adorable and alarming that Banner knows so many lyrics to so many songs.  Adorable because OMG, have you ever heard a three year old sing?  And alarming because I'm not sure everything Trevor and I listen to is...umm...appropriate for his age.  Then again hearing a three year old sing along to Riptide and announce, "I swear she's destined for the screen/Closest thing to Michelle Pfeiffer that you've ever seen," is pretty much the highlight of my day.

When someone comes over, Banner either says, "Wanna play with my trains?" or "You can play with my trains if you want to".  Both kill me.  PLAY WITH THAT KID ALREADY!

Related:  When Banner walks up to Trevor and says, "Daddy, wanna wrestle?"  How do you say no?

Someone please lie to me and tell me "pooting" (as Banner calls it) becomes less funny as boys get older.  Thanks.

Banner:  "Uh oh!"

Trevor:  "It's okay.  U-verse just timed out.  It will be back in a second."

Banner:  "It broken?"

Trevor:  "No, it's fine, buddy."

Banner:  "Daddy fix it?"

Trevor:  "All we need to do is be patient.  It will fix itself in a second."

Banner:  "Be patient?"

Trevor:  "Yes, buddy.  Patience.  You don't have it."

Banner:  "Oh.  Okay."

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