Okay.
So, tonight the NON DOMINANT TWIN (NDT) and I are playing tennis together (and by "playing tennis" I really mean that we will be spending most of our time running around chasing balls. Yes. We are THAT bad. Personally, I think that we are SO bad at tennis that it we have actually gone BEYOND bad and become experts at a completely new game that just happens to utilize tennis courts and rackets).
Anyway, NDT just called me to ask what time we should plan to meet. We agreed on the 6:30 to 7 PM hour for two reasons. 1) I want the RED OZONE ALERT to have a chance to expire (or, at least, "fade") and 2) NDT and the DOMINANT TWIN (DT) are going to Half Price Books after work.
This is how our conversation went:
NDT: "Yeah, my sister and I are going to go to Half Price Books first. Is 6:30 too late for you?"
ME: "Oh, no. Not at all. Is your sister going to join us?"
NDT: "When?"
ME: "For tennis."
NDT: "Oh. [PAUSE] No, she isn't coming."
ME: "Really? Why not?"
NDT: "She doesn't sweat."
ME: "[LONG PAUSE] She doesn't sweat?"
NDT: "No. She doesn't sweat."
ME: "Uh..."
NDT: "Or, rather, she doesn't like to sweat."
ME: "Huh?! Really? I thought she liked to go running."
NDT: "She does."
ME: "Well, doesn't she sweat when she runs?"
NDT: "Yes, but she doesn't like to."
ME: "Oh."
NDT: "It just got too warm outside for her to run and not sweat."
ME: "Uh. Okay."
Okay, so it might just be me, but I sweat when I run. It doesn't matter when I run - I'll be sweating regardless. I ran a half marathon a little over a year ago in December. It was freakin'' freezing and I was sweating like a...well...like you wouldn't believe.
Which brings me back to DT...she MUST sweat when she runs. I don't think it has as much to do with the seasons or hot versus "not-as-hot" (we live in Texas after all - not the Canadian tundra. It is ALWAYS a degree of hot down here).
Anyway, it was just interesting to have this conversation with NDT. It was definitely a "Whaaaa?!" kind of moment.
Oh, and FYI...DT is also the author of Impatient Chicken.
Now, that everyone knows that DT has an irrational fear of sweating (which is much weirder than my irrational fear of donuts, by the way. So far, I have avoided developing complexes about the daily functions of my physical being. You all should have seen DT and NDT in the bathroom at Dave 'n' Busters a few weeks back. It took us 15 minutes to get OUT of the bathroom. And by OUT I mean the 15 minutes it took to prepare the "we-just-washed-our-hands-and-cannot-touch-the-door-handles fire line". There was awhile where I wasn't sure we were going to make it OUT - EVER), go back and read her "postings" on going up the stairs at work. Sheds a WHOLE new light on her entries!
At least it makes me giggle!
8 comments:
It is not that . . . ok, well . . . I just don't like to sweat, ok? And I've got news for you Deals--in the winter time, I pretty much don't sweat when I run. Maybe I'm just not putting enough effort into it.
jlr, i'm not convinced this "diet" thing is going to work out for you if you don't do the portion of the D-word which requires the E and S words.
those being: EXERCISE and SWEATING.
just a friendly public service announcement from The Management.
Hey, don't hate on the bathroom handle thing. When I was in high school there was a water fountain right outside of the bathroom, so after exiting the bathroom (using my pinky to pull the door handle) I always went directly to the water fountain and washed my pinky (using my knee to hit the water fountain button). People used to make fun of me, but they were disgusting, dirty-handed people.
That's right, Kim! You tell her. Last winter when Deals got sick, I wiped down all the door handles, etc., that she had touched with an antibacterial towlette, and she made fun of me for that, too, but did I get sick? No, I did not. Well, I had one day of sniffles. Ask Deals how long she was sick. It was a long time.
I had an antibiotic resistant strain of Bronchitis! Totally not my fault. I work with kids, and they are like little disease carrying cesspools (especially, the fourth graders). In the wintertime, they are ALL sick. Every last one. And they are all couching and sneezing on each other. Ew. They should all be dipped in Lysol or something before entering the building.
Plus, I just moved back to Dallas. I'm used to germs of the Northeast - not these Southwestern germs. Not to mention the change in pollen (I am super, super allergic to this state, I swear)!
Oh, and just one more thing (to set the record straight)...we were at Dave 'n' Busters. Yes, we went to the bathroom. Yes, we all washed our hands. Yes, I like to not touch the door handles afterwards, but we were going back out into the "midway" to play more games! What is the point of spending 15 minutes escaping the bathroom without touching the door handle if you are just making a beeline back to SkiBall? I wonder what is growing on those wooden balls? Ew, ew, ew. Probably something much, much worse than anything in the bathroom. At least they probably CLEAN the bathroom quazi regularly. Who knows about the games?!
I hear that it's often safer (in terms of germs) to use the bathroom than to eat the food. Public bathrooms get cleaned on a regular basis. When did you last clean the kitchen floor?
When I was a kid, I used to play a game we called Generous Neighbors. It involved hitting tennis balls with rackets over someone's backyard fence. This was an honest attempt to learn to play tennis; it just never worked. Whether you got the balls back depended on whether you could make it into the neighbor's yard without getting caught.
Yes, you all make good points, but the thing is, I *know* what kind of germs are on the bathroom door handle.
Plus, I've seen public restrooms get cleaned, but I've never seen anyone wipe down the door handle.
Deals-
I am sure there is some logic behind your thoughts that 4th graders are disease ridden cesspools more so than any other age. Please elaborate... right now my 1 and 1/2 year old daughter is spewing germs everywhere.
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