I’m like a Darwin Award waiting to happen...

I had surgery on Friday. Not MAJOR surgery or anything like that, but surgery nevertheless.

Like most outpatient procedures, I needed someone to go with me so they could take me home. Thinking I had made a good decision, I chose my mom. I thought this was kind of a no brainer. It’s my mom, after all. She’d get me home okay, right?

Well, almost.

See her car ran out of gas on the drive home, and I found myself pushing her red SUV up a hill into a parking lot off of Greenville Avenue.

Normally, this wouldn’t have been a problem. I’m good in a crisis – especially one that requires a bit of muscle. Not that I’m Hercules or anything like that, but I do lift weights regularly. And as girls go, I think I’m pretty strong. However, I had just a procedure done (less than two hours before) that required me to…uhmmm…take it easy for awhile. And by “easy” I really mean that I had temporarily sworn off the following activities:

1. Running


2. Jumping


3. Aerobics


4. Weight Training or lifting of any kind

To be perfectly honest, it didn’t occur to me at the time that I shouldn’t be pushing the car up a hill. I was lost in the moment, and the only thing on my mind was getting my mother and her vehicle out of the busy intersection. That is until my left leg (which had been more or less numb up until that moment thanks to the local anesthetic) started to scream in agony hurt a lot.

(Sigh. I’m stupid, I know.)

Long story short, once my mother was able to refuel, we ended up having to go back to the doctor’s office to check and make sure I hadn’t done any permanent damage to my newly operated on left leg. Luckily, I hadn’t (thank goodness), and the doctor even had a good sense of humor about the situation. I think the conversation went something like this:

Doctor: “[On entering the examination room] What did you do?!”

Me: “Pushed a car up a hill. My mom ran out of gas.”

Doctor: “Wow. Never thought I need to put ‘do NOT push a car up a hill’ on the list of strenuous activities to avoid after surgery until I met you.”

Me: “Yeah. Sorry about that.”

*Alas*